5 Tips for Having Your Wedding Your Way

It’s easy for me to say “Your Wedding Your Way”. When you get engaged it’s really exciting and you have lots of amazing things to look forward to! (For me, cake tasting all the way). At some stage of your planning you’re likely to experience a phenomenon where anyone and everyone has an opinion on your wedding day. It might be something as simple as saying ‘don’t pick pate as a starter’ or ‘I hate those style wedding dresses’ and in some cases they can be emotionally manipulative ‘I won’t come if…’ or ‘Someone won’t like that’. They’re often well meant, they’re just trying to make sure you have the best day possible. So how do you deal with these unwanted interferences without upsetting everyone? How do you get the day you really want and still keep everyone happy?

  1. Stay calm - planning your wedding is a very emotional time. This means you’ll experience amazing highs, but it also means that you can be more sensitive to things that upset you. By removing the emotion from the situation, taking a step back and seeing the bigger picture you’ll be able to give a more measured response. If someone says something that touches a nerve, take a deep breath and pause before responding. Remember, that the comment comes from a good place, and they aren’t trying to upset you. Staying calm and composed will prevent an argument.

  2. Keep people in the loop - people love to hear your plans and the more they are aware of the direction your heading in, the less likely they’ll be to suggest something totally different! It also makes those key people feel like they’re involved even if you’re still making all the decisions.

  3. Provide a reason - often you’ll have decided something for your wedding for a particular reason. That dress because it makes you feel incredible, that main course because it’s what we had on our first date, those flowers because they’re your grandmother’s favourite. People won’t always know what your reasoning is behind your choices for your wedding day so if someone disapproves or is providing opinions that aren’t welcome, explain why you’ve made those choices. Even if the reason is that you and your partner love that particular shade of lime green be clear that this is why you’ve chosen it. Friends and family will be so much more understanding when they know there’s a logic to your decisions and they’re much less likely to object.

  4. Be considerate - you’re thinking, but she said it’s our wedding our way?! It is, but there is also something to be said for being considerate of your guests. If you have elderly relatives that can’t get around, don’t pick a castle with 500 stairs as your venue. If you’ve got guests with dietary requirements, make sure they’ll be catered for. It’s never about choosing something you don’t want to make other people happy, I would never suggest that. Just make sure that your choices factor in other people’s needs. It shows you’ve been thoughtful and caring and therefore they are much more likely to be happy and content with what you’ve chosen. Getting what you want and managing to keep everyone else happy - that’s the dream!

  5. If you’re happy, they’ll be happy - I can’t stress this one enough. People may grumble and moan about things (it’s too far to travel, I’ve had to take a day off work etc.) but when they see you on your special day celebrating how much you love and adore each other, smiling and laughing with your nearest and dearest, all those worries and groans will disappear. Happiness and love really are infectious so it’s important that you’re going to be happy on your wedding day. It’s a sure fire way to make sure everyone else has a good time too. If you spend too much time and effort focusing on making sure everyone else has a good time and you end up miserable your guests will sense that and the whole day will be a flop. Make yourselves happy and your guests will follow suit. I promise.

I know it seems easy for me to say but I’ve been there and done it on so many occasions. Planning a wedding is an emotional rollercoaster but it doesn’t need to be a stressful one. Take my advice, stay calm and make sure you and your partner are happy. It is your day after all.


Need help with planning your wedding day? Or just want someone to plan it for you? Toastworthy Events offers a range of planning services from full wedding planning to on the day support, hen/stag parties, honeymoons and more. For further information and to book a free consultation please visit https://toastworthyevents.co.uk/ or contact us at hello@toastworthyevents.co.uk